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What the highest performers know about LOVE that everyone else misses

I got to spend time two weeks ago with an entrepreneurial titan: Someone who is light years ahead of his insurance industry peers in terms of production and almost everything I could want to be at his age – 78. He also speaks and travels the world, often with his family. He loves people and even more than that, he loves inspiring them to elevate their worlds. He’s an effervescent extrovert, a man of God, a self-described “risk-taker,” and he’s a messenger of love.

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Last week I got to spend time with another big entrepreneurial success story who sold a thriving insurance tech business in his 30’s and is now working on new bolder endeavours. He’s as inspiring as anyone I’ve ever met. He’s as equally driven to help others elevate their worlds because his purpose is to inspire one billion wild moments in the lives of others “because they are the currency of life.” (Notice the size of his goal) He’s a passionate introvert, a rebel with a cause, and he’s a messenger of love.

Despite their polar-opposite personalities, I am convinced that a large reason for their unusual success is their love. And you can do exactly the same (whatever your personality).

Too often in my past, I was focused on the revenue opportunity. Yes, I’ve almost always enjoyed my work and I’ve always wanted to make a difference, but I’ve spent most of my life trying to loosen the shackles of a scarcity mindset that I was hardwired with in my family – that there were only ever a few pieces of pie available, and I needed to scramble to get my slice.

On one level, it’s easy to relate to the need to put food on the table. But if I spend my life aiming low and meeting lower-level expectations and focusing on immediate financial gain, my life is destined to be, well, lower-level. Same for you.

1. The entrepreneurial titan who’s 78 said to me recently: “Why are most salespeople focused on the commission instead of focusing on loving people? If they just focused on that, on GIVING more to the relationship, and on an ever-higher level of service to others, they would enjoy a lot more sales success…if they would approach a prospect not as a potential commission but as a new person to get to know, they would end up doing a lot better in their sales.”

2. He also believes that the more you fall in love with what you do, the more that energy will transfer itself onto others who are then more likely going to do business with you and become stronger advocates for you. Please keep in mind, he grew up poor and didn’t suddenly “become” a loving person after he made his millions!

This reminds me of the billionaire financial advisor I met from Dubai who said he was never introduced to wealthy families as a financial advisor but as a friend they should get together with sometime. He too genuinely loves meeting new people and the energy they give him.

The cynic would argue that these wealthy people can afford to take this approach because they don’t need the money. This is rather like the cynic who says a bestselling author can afford to carve out half the day to write but miss the point entirely that this author became successful because he or she was willing to carve out the time to write long before any money or acclaim came their way.

The truth is no one in any field can succeed greatly without taking a leap of faith whether it’s to carve out half the day to write or to build business relationships with love instead of commission breath. That’s the leap of faith I urge you to incorporate. People can feel it.

Useful questions for you are:
What can you do to inject more love into your relationships and prospecting?
How can you have some more fun with it?
How can you go deeper with people so they know you genuinely care about them and are not just paying them lip service and talking a good game?
How can you show people more of who you truly are – from your heart?

Start here and make a note every day about how many people you ‘touched’ or how you appreciated them differently. You can put this on your Habit Tracker. Or make it part of your daily review. And, yes, make it a daily item, so you do it often enough for it to become a habit and for you see the benefits.

3. The other ingredient to love is best summarised by Tony Robbins. In a live workshop two years ago, I heard him recommend this: “Don’t fall in love with your products or service. If you really want to be wealthy, get addicted to falling in love with your IDEAL client. GET OBSESSED WITH ADDING VALUE.” Almost no one has any interest in doing this. Perhaps it sounds like a lot of work. But it’s rather like taking care of your health: put in some extra work now, enjoy better results and save yourself many ugly years of pain later.

Now is the best time to put in extra love: Have you experienced lower levels of service since the Pandemic hit? Many people are noticing that what is now socially acceptable service has dropped and feels increasingly impersonal and apathetic. I call it Fake Friendly and Attentive but Soulless.

And have you EVER spoken to someone who complained that they had too much love in their life?! Arguably, this actually makes it easier for you to set yourself apart with loving attention and outstanding service when many people are feeling demoralised and putting in minimal effort.

I could be remembering wrong, but at Live Aid in 1985, I seem to remember Elvis Costello leaning into the microphone and, before playing his acoustic version of the Beatles’* All You Need is Love, said: “I think this should be the National Anthem.”
Well, we can all take a page from that book and make sure it’s part of our mission.

To A Lot More Loving on Family, Prospects, and Clients!
Matt Anderson
Founder & President
Matt Anderson International

1177 Oak Ridge Drive, Glencoe, IL 60022, USA
Phone: +001 (312) 622-3121

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